1. Imagine the worst
So you are having a chaotic moment with your kids. One child is crying, one is yelling, one is hitting you, and the fourth is strangely quiet. You feel like you are about to scream like a three eyed monster. Stop for a second to observe your crazy current situation and imagine how it could be worse. The fourth child could throw up and one of the kids could slip and fall in it. Yup, that would definitely be worse than this moment. Then after imagining a hairier situation, the current one is still awful but somehow seems a bit more manageable.
2. Hide in the closet
Sometimes a caregiver needs a few minutes to themselves to sit down, close their eyes and not have anyone asking them for something. Suggest that you play hide-and-seek with your kids. You hide. Lets face it, you are an adult who probably has some experience with this game, Im sure you can find a good hiding spot that will take your kids at least four minutes to find you. Ask your kids to count to the highest number they know, three times and then come and find you. That should give you enough time to regroup, breathe and be genuinely delighted to see the look on their face when they finally do find you.
3. You be the seeker
Now it is their turn to hide and you get to count to 100 and then go hunting for your children. You can make a production over looking in all sorts of obvious spots all around them before you actually find them. This can take several minutes in which you are again recharging your battery without anything being asked of you.
4. Ask your children to baby you
If you are having trouble dressing a child to go outside and the situation is quickly going downhill, try asking the child to dress you. If you turn the tables on them and ask the child to help you put on your boots, chances are they will be delighted to assist you. After they help you with your boots, you can comment on their knowledge of boots as you quickly slip their boots on. This works with older kids too, just pretend you are sooo tired you cant manage without them and it will get them giggling or maybe just a slight smile and an eye roll. It still works to diffuse the situation.
Good luck with your day. Remember, this too shall pass.